Our new addition

Being a mom has brought a whole new meaning to life. Towards the end of my pregnancy I was so worried about the what if's...Having children was something that I had always wanted but as time drew near the reality began to set in. My emotions started running and I began to do things assuming that everything was going to be my "last time". Every dollar movie with Josh, every adventure, you name it... I was convinced would be the last time. It scared me that it was never just going to be the two of us anymore. How would being home all day be when I've been in the workforce for the last 4 years? How would my life change? Could I do without sleep? Would I be a good mom?

All of these questions ran through my head and what scared me the most was knowing I was soon going to be responsible for another human being. She would look to me for guidance, advice, and watch my every move. I didn't want to mess anything up and hoped that she could look back one day and view me as her role model.

My sweet husband reminded me that it wouldn't do any good to worry about the future. I just needed to take everything day by day. He was right; I knew that all I could do was rely on the Lord for help. I had to accept that I would make mistakes along the way and at the very least my love for her would be enough.

It was time...October 15th came and that was the day that forever changed our life! We went into the hospital at 8:30am. My contractions started and then all of a sudden I heard a woman screaming bloody murder. I looked at Josh with horror on my face and we both began to laugh. I was tempted to run out of the room. We turned on the tv to drown out the noise. The screaming lasted quite a while and then came silence..shortly after we heard a crying baby. I told Josh that she better have been doing it natural or I was going to walk right on outta there. Luckily the nurse told us that what we heard was a natural birth. Im sorry but...WHY! After hearing that, I will never consider going natural.

Anyways, My contractions started and a couple of hours later I was at a 9. The nurse couldn't believe how fast I was dilating. She told me to quickly call my mom and mother in law; we were having this baby soon! Once they arrived we began the process and 30 minutes later I heard my sweet little miracle cry. The feeling is one in which you can't explain.

Josh and I are so grateful for all of the love and support we had from friends and family. We are so lucky to have our loved ones close by. Our hospital stay was filled with visitors.

Bringing home our little one was so much fun. She is such a good baby and typically only cries when she is hungry. We put her in her crib after 3 days because nobody was getting any sleep. I felt so bad staring at this tiny helpless body in what appeared to be a huge cage. We did it anyways and she slept great; everyone was happy.

I try to embrace every moment with her and talk to her constantly even though she has no idea what I am saying. It is amazing how simply serving someone allows you to love them more and more each day. My heart already doesn't feel like it could love anything more but continues to do so.

My favorite moments are during our nightly feeds. Instead of flipping through instagram or facebook to kill time, I leave my phone off and just stare at her. I can't believe she is mine. This time allows me sit in silence and soak in each moment with her because I know she will grow up all too fast. Feeding her at night is the one time I don't feel like I'm going a million miles an hour. There really is something cool about the quietness of it all. Even though I am exhausted it is pretty surreal to look out and think about all the other women that are out there doing the same in that moment.

I LOVE being a mother and watching Josh become a dad has been so special.

Our family of 3...4 including Rufus ;-) is the best blessing. You are reminded that family is all that matters. I am looking forward to each stage of being a mom and the trials/joy that come with it.

She is so precious...